Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker (2019)

A year after the Battle of Crait, Kylo Ren discovers that, somehow, Emperor Palpatine is still alive. Initially hoping to kill him, Kylo is persuaded to join Palpatine after he sees that the latter has, somehow, by himself, created an entire fleet of Star Destroyers. He also learns that Rey is Palpatine’s granddaughter, and that Palpatine wants to kill and/or convert her, depending on what scene he’s in. Meanwhile, Rey learns that Palpatine is alive, and so she, Finn and Poe set off to find a dagger, which will help them find a thing, which will lead them to the Emperor. I think. Will they do any of that? Watch the movie to find out.

Valerian & The City Of A Thousand Planets (To Infinity Retrospective)

Do I have to? Ugh. Fine. Okay, like, welcome to the To Infinity Retrospective, a series created in preparation for Rise Of Skywalker. Blah, blah, blah. Look, we’re only 18 days out from the premiere, so we had to do one more of these. And what better way to end this series of Space Opera reviews than with Valerian And The City Of A Thousand Planets? (He said sarcastically). What’s it about? Hell if I know, but keep reading and try to find out.

Jupiter Ascending (To Infinity Retrospective)

Welcome back to the To Infinity Retrospective. A SERIES CREATED IN PREPARATION FOR RISE OF SKYWALKER! Oh! Dear me. Don’t know what just happened there. Anyway, EACH MONTH, I REVIEW A DIFFERENT SPACE OPERA! Goodness, I’m so embarrassed. I promise that won’t happen again. Anyway, this month, we’re looking at Jupiter Ascending. What’s it about? Well…

Guardians Of The Galaxy (To Infinity Retrospective)

“Come and get your love!” Oh, hey there. Welcome to the To Infinity Retrospective. “Come and get your love!” A series created in preparation for Rise Of Skywalker. Each month, I review a different Space Opera, and, this time, we’re returning to the world of films that people have actually seen with Guardians of the Galaxy. What’s it about? Well…

Ender’s Game (To Infinity Retrospective)

ATTENTION! At ease, cadets. Welcome to the To Infinity Retrospective, a series created in preparation for Rise of Skywalker. Each month, you will receive reviews of different Space Operas, and it will be your job to read said reviews, like them, and share them with all your friends. Failure to do so will mean the end of the human race. This month, you’ll be looking at a critique of 2013’s Ender’s Game. What’s it about? Well…

John Carter (To Infinity Retrospective)

(Grrrrrrrrrr!) Welcome to the To Infinity Retrospective, a series I created in preparation for Rise Of Skywalker. At the start of each month (Agh!) I review a different space opera (Shit!). And today (snarl!) we’ll be taking a look at the 2012 Disney film John Carter. What’s it about?

Avatar (To Infinity Retrospective)

Welcome, brothers and sisters, to the To Infinity Retrospective, a series I created in preparation for Rise Of Skywalker. On the first day of each month, I review a different space opera. Why, you ask? Simple. I do it to send the sky people a message. I do it to tell them that they can’t take whatever they want, that they can be stopped, and that this, this is our land! And what better way to convey that message than through a review of this month’s film, Avatar. What’s it about? Well…

Titan A.E. (To Infinity Retrospective)

Yo yo! What up, my peeps? Welcome back to the Too Infinity Retrospective, a series I created in preparation for Rise Of Skywalker. Each month, I, like, totally review a different space opera. And this month, we’re going back to the year 2000, the raddest time ever, ya’ll, and taking a look at Titan A.E. What’s it about? Well…

The Fifth Element (To Infinity Retrospective)

HEY! HI! HOW’S IT GOING? WELCOME TO THE TO INFINITY RETROSPECTIVE, A SERIES I CREATED IN PREPARATION FOR STAR WARS 9. WHICH WE NOW KNOW IS CALLED “RISE OF SKYWALKER.” ANYWAY, ON THE FIRST DAY OF EACH MONTH, I REVIEW A DIFFERENT SPACE OPERA, AND, THIS MONTH, WE’LL BE LOOKING AT THE FIFTH ELEMENT, A WACKY, WILD AND WEIRD OFFERING FROM 1997. What’s it about? Well…

Starship Troopers (To Infinity Retrospective)

Welcome, citizens, to the To Infinity Retrospective, a series created in preparation for Star Wars 9. On the first day of each month, a different Space Opera will be reviewed. And it is your civic duty to read them all. This month, we’ll be covering the 1997 action-satire, Starship Troopers, a film as dense with subtext as it is with blood and boobs. Would you like to know more?